This Spring season has been so true for my heart. It’s been a time of drought and growth. There have been growing pains and heartache. Oh, but there has been so much more. Joy. Grace. Peace.
There’s something so beautiful about growth, isn’t there? When you’re staring at growth, nothing happens. So many times I feel like I have such a surface level view of my own heart. I question why I’m not growing. Why I’m stuck in the same place I was months ago. Typically I don’t have an accurate view of where I am until I’m looking back on where I was.
This season has been one of growth. Personally and spiritually. The Lord has been working. Growing me. Stretching me. Looking back I can clearly see what he has been doing all along. He’s been with me. He’s been speaking to me. He’s been here all along. Part of this growing season has brought me to a place where I fully and desperately realize my need for truth. Satan has been attacking. Hard. And it’s when I’m reminded of truth that I can battle against the lies he throws at me daily. Satan just loves to attack when we’re in the midst of something bigger and better, doesn’t he?
We’ve been studying plants in school this semester. Every little thing we can learn about plants we’re learning. It has been such a joy to sit and watch the boys soak in the information they’re learning. They’re so intrigued by the way a plant grows. We planted little seeds to grow tomato plants (thank you Target dollar section!) To be honest, I was very skeptical and was worried they wouldn’t even grow. Within a week all three boys had at least one sprout. What little faith I had.
I was amazed week after week as we watched these seedlings grow. The boys showed so much care and love for their little plants. I had so much joy watching them ask questions about their plants. There were a few mornings where they came running into the classroom in panic because their plants were “dead”. The plants had flooded after a huge thunderstorm so the boys decided the plants needed LOTS of sun. They were right. Another morning they came in upset because their plants were far too dry. Honestly, I thought the plants were done. They were wilted and falling over. Not a single stem was standing straight up. But the boys knew. They knew their plant needed water and they diligently watered those little plants. By the next morning, the leaves were green and the stems were standing straight up again.
What a sweet, sweet picture. Doesn’t our Heavenly Father care for us in the same way? Doesn’t He know what we need? I have to remind myself daily that He is for me. He is for us. When I’m drowning, He knows what I need. When I’m withered and weary, HE knows what I need. His love for me, and us, is so far greater than my wildest imagination could ever comprehend. I know this truth. I hear it all the time. Yet I forget it. Constantly. When I’m drowning or dried up, I question why. All the meanwhile the Lord is there, caring for me and giving me exactly what I need.
Today we planted our seedlings into the garden in hopes that with more room and more soil they will be able to grow into big, strong plants and bear fruit. What started out as a little seed has the potential to bring life. How precious is that truth. I’ve learned so much about my heart and life these past few weeks from little seeds and three little boys who have stolen my heart over this past year. Through the process, the growth was hard to see and hard to understand. But looking back I see that the Lord was faithful and was there working and growing me from the start. From the very, very start of it all.